bpd · health · mental health

Back to work I go..

Writing this while on the bus so bare with me. This morning was as much of a struggle as I expected it to be. I stayed in bed for 20 minutes tossing and turning still asleep, took another 10 for morning coffee and just about made it on time to leave my house. I waste a lot of my morning this way, although last week I started making healthy changes to my morning routine this time off kind of took that away. Plus I slept a lot this holiday weekend makes me wonder whether I really do need more sleep than what I get. I dont know if its the prozac as it makes me yawn but either way, I still feel constantly exhausted… not a physical exhausted just a ‘fed up’ kind of tired. This attitude then goes into work where I fake it. I think a lot of it is to do with me not particularly liking my job or working at all. Im quite happy at home spending time with my family and focusing on recovery but then working is just a means for me to afford that so I push myself.

Anyway, pity party aside, I am going to try out some of my DBT today at work. It’s still about maintaining relationships by being mindful. (There’s a lot of mini aspects that come under this so I break it down and practice little things daily). So the part I will be trying has to do with ‘describing’ your interactions. So in your mind you replace any judgemental language you are using and simply stick to describing the event in a ‘matter of fact’ (non biased/judgemental) way. This includes the who, what, where of the situation. It includes distinguishing the difference between what is going on externally (ie. in the outside world) and what you are experiencing internally (thoughts, feelings, sensations – eg. ‘I notice my chest is tightening’) So while I’m talking to my colleagues today I’m going to practice describing as well as just generally trying to implement the mindfulness I learnt yesterday and see how it goes. I will report back!

Also will try to upload the handout that I am getting this from.

hopefully he’ll call me today…

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